Before I begin this article, I want to say something. I could talk about this topic for years and write millions of words because it is my favorite subject. But for now, I am only sharing my understanding.
Many years ago, I heard a story that stayed with me. It became one of my favorites, and I still remember it almost line by line. About a week ago, I watched a video that included many different stories. One of them had almost the same ending as the story I heard years ago.
It is a beautiful story, and I have learned a lot from it. I hope you will learn something from it too. At the end of this article, I will share what love means to me. Maybe my perspective will help you see the world in a different way and give you something meaningful to think about.
To be honest, I should probably be working on my apps instead. But I left all of that aside to write this because I genuinely felt that I should. Maybe these words will help someone, and if they do, then writing this will be worth it.
So, let’s begin.The Tree Gave Everything. The Boy Gave Nothing. This Story Will Break Your Heart and Fix It Too. Most people spend their whole life giving love a name without ever understanding what it actually is. I was one of them. And then I came across two things that changed how I see every relationship I have ever had.
The first is a story. A story so simple it should not hurt this much. But it will. The second is a truth so uncomfortable that most people will refuse to accept it. Only 10 percent of people understand the actual meaning and value of love. I used to wonder why. And then I came across this story. And after this, I stopped wondering.
Understanding is deeper than knowledge. There are many people who know you, but very few who understand you. This story is not about knowledge. It is about understanding.
The Tree That Loved Without Reason
I have heard of a very old tree. Its branches spread across the sky like the arms of an emperor. When flowers bloomed on it, birds came from far away just to take in the fragrance. When fruits appeared, butterflies would dance around it. Its shadow, its wide open arms, the way it stood in the wind, all of it was beautiful against the sky.
A small child used to come every day to play in its shade. And that great tree fell in love with that small child.
The big can love the small. But only if the big do not know that they are big. The tree had no idea that it was big. Only humans carry that awareness. That is why the tree could love.
Ego always tries to love those who are bigger than itself. Ego always connects with those who are above it. But love has no big or small. Whoever comes, love connects with them.
When Love Bends Down
The child was small and the branches were high. So the tree would bend its branches down for him so he could pick the fruits, pick the flowers. Love is always ready to bend. Ego is never ready to bend.
If you go to ego, ego lifts its hands even higher so you cannot reach. Because whoever can be touched is considered small. Only the one who cannot be touched, who sits far away on some throne, that person is considered great.
But the tree’s branches would come down the moment that child came playing. And when the child plucked its flowers, the tree would become very happy. Its whole being would fill with joy.
When love is able to give something, it becomes happy. When ego is able to take something, only then it becomes happy.
The Boy Grew Up
The child used to sometimes sleep in the tree’s shade, sometimes eat its fruits, sometimes make a crown of its flowers and wear it and become the emperor of the forest.
Whoever has the flowers of love raining down on them becomes an emperor. And wherever ego surrounds a person, everything becomes darkness, the person becomes poor and small.
The boy would wear the crown of flowers and dance and the tree would be very happy. Its whole being would fill with joy. The winds would rustle and the tree would sing.
Then the boy grew older. He started climbing the tree, started swinging from its branches. He would rest on its branches and the tree would be full of joy.
Love becomes joyful when love becomes a shade for someone. Ego becomes joyful when it snatches someone’s shade away.
When Ambition Came
But the boy kept growing and the days kept passing. As the boy got bigger, his other work in the world also came. Ambitions arrived. He had exams to pass. Friends to impress. He would come sometimes, sometimes not at all. But the tree would wait for him. Come, come. Its whole being would call out, come, come.
Love always waits. Love is a waiting, an awaiting.
But when he would come sometimes and not come other times, the tree would become sad. Love has only one sadness. When it cannot share, it becomes sad. And love has only one joy. When it gives, when it pours itself out, then it becomes joyful.
As the boy got bigger in the world of ambition, the chances of him coming near love kept getting fewer and fewer.
What Is Yours If I Come?
Then one day the boy was passing by and the tree called to him. In the winds its voice echoed. I wait for you. I look for you. I watch for you.
The boy said, what do you have that I should come? I need money.
Ego always asks, what do you have that I should come? Ego demands, if there is something I will come. If there is nothing, there is no need to come. Ego has a purpose, a reason. If the purpose is served then I will come. If there is no purpose, why come at all.
And love is purposeless. Love has no purpose. Love is its own purpose. It is completely purposeless.
The tree was stunned. It said, you will only come if I can give you something? I can give you everything. Because love does not want to hold anything back. Whatever holds back is not love. Ego holds back. Love gives unconditionally. But money I do not have. Money is only a human invention. Trees have not caught this disease.
The tree said, that is exactly why we are so joyful. So many flowers bloom on us, so many fruits come, such great shade we have. We dance so much in the sky, we sing so many songs. Birds come to us and fill the air with music. Because we have no money. The day we also have money, we will also sit in poor little temples like humans wondering how to find peace, how to find love. No no, we have no money.
So the boy said, then why should I come to you? I have to go where the money is.
The Tree Gave Everything
The tree thought for a long time. Then an idea came. Then you do one thing. Take all my fruits, pick them and sell them, maybe you will get some money.
And the boy too thought about it. He climbed up and picked all the fruits. He knocked down the unripe ones too. Branches broke, leaves fell. But the tree was very happy, very joyful.
Even when broken, love remains joyful. Ego even when it receives is not joyful, even when it gets it remains unhappy.
And the boy did not even say thank you when he left. But the tree did not even notice. Because for the tree, the thanks had already come. He had accepted its love and taken its fruits to the market to sell.
But then the boy did not come for a very long time. He had money now and he was busy trying to make money from money. He forgot.
Years passed. And the tree is sad. But its being is overflowing with juice waiting for its beloved to come and take that juice. Like a mother whose breasts are full of milk and her son is lost, and her whole being is aching, where is my son, who will find him, who will make me lighter, who will unburden me. Like that the tree’s being began to be pained. Come, come, come.
A Man Came Back
After many days he came back. But now that boy had become a grown man. The tree said, come to me. Come into my embrace.
He said, leave this nonsense. These are childhood things.
Ego thinks love is madness, childhood things.
The tree said, come, swing from my branches. Dance.
He said, leave these pointless things. I have to build a house. Can you give me a house?
The tree said, a house? We live without houses. In this whole world only humans live in houses. No one else does. And look at the condition of the human who lives in houses. The bigger the house gets, the smaller the human becomes. We live without houses. But one thing is possible. If you cut my branches and take them, maybe you can build a house.
And that grown man came with an axe and cut down all the branches of that tree. The tree became a bare stump, naked. But the tree was very joyful.
Love is always joyful, even if its limbs are cut away. As long as someone takes something, someone shares, someone becomes a part of it, a partner in it.
And the boy did not even look back. He built his house. And time kept passing. That stump kept watching the road waiting for him to come. It wanted to call out but now it had no leaves, no branches. The winds would come and it could not even speak, could not even call.
But inside its being there was only one echo. Come. Come.
When There Was Nothing Left to Give
Many more days passed. Then that child had become an old man. He was passing by near the tree. He came and stood near the stump. The tree asked, what can I do for you? You have come after so many days.
He said, what can you do now? I have to go to a far country to earn money. I need a boat.
So the tree said, cut me further and a boat can be made from my trunk. And I will be very blessed that I could become your boat and take you to a far country. But come back quickly and come back safely. I will wait for you.
And he sawed down the tree. Then only a small stump remained. And he went off on his long journey. And that stump also kept waiting. Come, come.
But now it has nothing left to give. Maybe he will not come. Because ego only goes where there is something to receive. Ego does not go where there is nothing to receive.
One Night I Was a Guest Near That Stump
I was a guest near that stump one night. And that stump spoke to me. My friend has not come yet. And I feel so much pain that maybe the boat sank, maybe he got lost somewhere, maybe in some far shore in some foreign land he forgot, maybe he drowned, maybe he is gone.
If just one piece of news would come. I am close to dying now. Just one piece of news that he is safe, that is all I need. Then nothing else matters. Then everything is fine.
Now I have nothing left to give so even if I call he probably will not come. Because he only understands the language of taking.
Ego understands the language of taking. Love is the language of giving.
I will not say more than this.
99 Percent Garbage, 1 Percent Gold
If you think carefully about the love of an ordinary human being, you will be very surprised. There is so much mud mixed into that love. There is so much garbage mixed into that gold that the gold might be 1 percent. 99 percent is garbage.
In the name of love, even hatred is hidden inside.
Have you ever noticed this? Love does not take long to turn into hatred. How long does it take for a friend to become an enemy? The woman you were ready to die for, you become ready to take her life too. How long does that take?
Love turns into hatred so quickly. Love can become hatred. And if love can become hatred then what kind of love is it?
Love cannot become hatred. Then whatever turned into hatred was never love in the first place. It was something else. It was hatred itself. It was just wearing the mask of love and putting on a performance.
What We Actually Do in the Name of Love
In the name of love you are exploiting each other. In the name of love you are using each other. In the name of love you are owning each other. In the name of love there is politics. There is manipulation.
Love is a very tempting word. A very beautiful word. It traps people very well. Whoever you tell that I love you very much, that person falls for your words.
You do not even love yourself. Then who else will you love?
You say you love your children. You do not love your children. You love them because they are yours. They are mine. It is part of your ego, that is why there is love. And if your son becomes the Prime Minister, a lot of love will be produced. And if your son becomes a criminal and goes to jail, you will go to court and announce that I refuse to accept that this is my son. The love will be finished.
Your love is also ego. Your love also goes only as far as your ego gets support. Gets respect. Gets honor.
Because of this experience of love people also start believing that love is a sin. But this is not even the experience of love. You kept picking up stones and pebbles and started saying that diamonds are a sin. You have no experience of diamonds.
What Real Love Actually Is
Experience love a little. Love is a wonderful phenomenon. It is not ordinary. It is extraordinary. The small ray of heaven that comes down to this earth, that is called love. The little glimpse of light that comes down into this darkness, that is called love. The little moisture that comes into this stony heart, that is called love.
Love means I am joyful in someone’s life. I am joyful because of someone’s life. Reasonless. Love has no reason. If there is a reason it is attachment. If there is no reason it is love.
If you tell someone I love you because of this reason, that is attachment. And if you cannot find any reason no matter how hard you look, if you look a million times and cannot find a reason, and you have to say I do not know why but there is love, then it is not attachment. That is love.
Love descends like it comes from the sky. It has no roots in the earth. Attachment has its roots in the earth.
Love Does Not Put a Noose Around Anyone’s Neck
And those who have called love a sin are making a mistake with words. They should call attachment a sin because attachment means the feeling of mine, possessiveness.
In love there is no attachment at all. Love is completely without attachment. You will be surprised to hear what I am saying. But I will say it again. Love is extremely without attachment. Love does not know attachment at all.
Love does not capture the other person. Neither does it capture nor does it allow itself to be captured. Love is freedom. Love is the exchange of freedom between two people. No one is anyone’s master and no one is anyone’s slave.
Love does not put a noose around each other’s necks. Love cuts nooses.
If you ever experience love in your life you will be surprised. You became free and the one you love also became free. Love brings liberation. Love is the giver of liberation.
And this kind of love is what Jesus called God. Buddha called it the final result of meditation. Mahavir called it the nature of liberation.
This love cannot be called a sin.
Why the Saints Got It Wrong Too
The words of the pandits and priests and so called saints suited you because they matched your experience. But your experience itself is wrong.
Your experience is of stones and pebbles. And when saints said that all diamonds are stones and pebbles, you also felt that the talk is right. And your experience of love in life is so polluted. So smoky. The flame is not even visible. There is only smoke.
So when the pandits said that eyes get damaged from smoke and there is only pain and where is happiness, you also agreed because that is your experience too.
But I tell you that love is a flameless flame. Love does not produce smoke. Yes, the garbage that is mixed in love produces smoke when it burns.
Understand it like this. You burn wood. When does smoke get produced and when does it not? Have you thought about it?
Burning wood never produces smoke if the wood is dry. If there is no water inside it, if it is not wet, then wood never produces smoke. If the wood is truly dry, completely dry, if there is not even a trace of water left in it, then there will be no smoke at all.
Smoke does not come from burning wood. But if the wood is wet then smoke comes. That wetness is not the wood. It is foreign to it.
If your love is blinding your eyes, if smoke is being produced, if life is becoming dark, if life is becoming full of confusion, if there is anger, if there is enmity, if there is jealousy, if there is burning, if all of this is happening, then understand that there is still a lot of garbage in your love. There is a lot of foreignness in it.
If someone calls this a sin it is fine. But it is not right to call love a sin.
Love never produces smoke. If your love produces smoke then dry the wood a little more. Make your love without attachment. Attachment keeps the wood wet. Make your love without attachment. Make your love without clinging.
Free your love from hatred, from jealousy, from burning.
And then you will be amazed that there is no need for prayer anymore. Your love itself became prayer.
Do Not Run Away. Do Not Renounce. Just Refine.
And the opportunity that life has given you for love, do not waste it like this.
People waste it in two ways. One are those people who keep doing something else in the name of love and think it is love. I call them the indulgers. The worldly ones. They waste their lives.
And the second are those who run away from the world. They get scared of the garbage of love and run away. Some have pressed the garbage to their chest. Some ran away scared of the garbage.
Those who pressed the garbage to their chest will also not find the gold. And those who ran away scared of the garbage, they ran away from the gold too. Because gold and garbage are all mixed together here. They will also never know love.
Those you consider saints, they also do not know love. Those you consider worldly, they also do not know love. The indulger is deprived. The yogi is deprived. Deprived in different ways but both deprived. One deprived because of holding on to garbage. One deprived because of leaving garbage. But both of them cannot see that something is hidden in the garbage. A lotus is hidden in the mud. Both of them cannot see this. That is their blindness.
I want you to live. Do not run away. Do not renounce.
Live life in its totality. Live life in all its forms. Yes. Just remember this one thing. Whatever form gives you pain, know that it needs to be refined. Not abandoned. Refined. Not renounced. Something in it is wrong. That wrongness has to be transformed.
What This Story Left Me With
May life become such a tree. And may the branches of that tree spread to infinity. May everyone be in its shade and may its arms reach to everyone. Then you can understand what love is.
Love has no scripture, no definition, no theory. It cannot be told in words. It can only be shown. If it shows in my eyes you can see it. If it shows in my hands you can see it. But if it is not in my eyes, if it is not in my hands, then no words can show you what love is.
You came naked. You will leave naked. You came without anything. You will leave without anything. So why so much hatred, resentment, envy, selfishness and pride? We will all go empty handed. Everything we have earned, we earned here and we will leave it here only. The only thing that will go with you is the love you gave. Not the love you received. The love you gave.
Everything in life is temporary. Pain is part of growing. But the one thing that does not die, even when the branches are cut, even when the trunk is taken, even when nothing is left, is love.
Because love does not need anything to remain. It just waits. Come. Come.
Everyone has a story. Take time to listen. Points of view are different, events mark people, circumstances shape people. Everybody’s views are valid. Going through something differently than you does not make their experience invalid. Show some understanding, be kind to others.
Do not waste the opportunity. Do not press the garbage to your chest. Do not run from it either. Just look carefully. The lotus is hidden in the mud. You only have to learn to see it.
Summary
Conclusion
I Will do lotes of hardwork for this article.
About The Author
Hemant Singh
Hello friends, I am Hemant, Technical Writer & Co-Founder of Education Learn Academy. Talking about education, I am a student. I enjoy learning things related to new technology and teaching others. I request you that you keep supporting us in this way and we will continue to provide new information for you. :)
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